Things Stress Does to You

This is totally scientific. And happens to everybody. Without variation.

1.   Makes you break out in hives.

Okay, this is actually poison ivy. But I like to think the poison ivy KNEW it had the opportunity to make a stressful week worse.

2.   Causes those around you to feel stressed.

Itchy with his nose under my shirt sleeve. Presumably, because of his stressful life.

3.   Causes you to crave un-holy amounts of jambalaya.

Big thank you to Chris for going to the store just to buy jambalaya stuff and then making it for me. :-)

4.   Makes you spend all day at school on Sunday to organize your Monday-Friday life.

I didn't make this mess, but that's a whole different story.

5.   Gives you mini-heart attacks when you can't find the 9 page lesson plan you wrote for your evaluation. Apparently, your computer will choose where to save your stuff unless you specifically tell it. It won't ask. Shouldn't it KNOW lesson plans go in C:/Documents/School/2nd Grade/Evaluations/Lesson Plans/DON'T GET FIRED?!?!

6.   Renders you unable to hang out with friends because you are at home at 9:00 pm on Friday crying because someone moved a stack of papers.

7.   Causes you to re-evaluate your life and how you're pretty sure you could make a living being an FBI Facebook stalker.

8.   Brings instant tears because your husband offered to bring you a coke from the fridge. You don't know why you're crying. It just sounded like a nice thing to do for someone. Now you're crying because you're embarrassed that a coke made you cry. You start offering nice things to do for your husband in hopes that if he cries too, you won't be so embarrassed. But he doesn't cry. Because cokes shouldn't make people cry.

To sum up, you should avoid getting too stressed because these things WILL happen to you. If you experience any other symptoms, you should probably consult a doctor. Or check and see if you're a teacher.